Peter is a growing weed. He's funny and cute, loud and obnoxious, silly and adorable. Such a little turkey. Like all mothers, I am sure that he is the sweetest, cutest baby ever. So lately I have been crazy busy. Back and forth from my mom's house to my house. Traveling is oooh my favorite. Still it's pretty fun getting to see all my siblings and having them interact with Peter. It sure helps when I'm just having a day where I feel like I just cannot hold him any longer. Don't get me wrong, he's perfect and everything I just don't want to hold him all the time.

At the moment he is sliding around on the floor whining. I'm not kidding. it's not really a cry and it's not really a fuss it's like a cough then a short wail then a cough cough. Throw in some grunts and gurgling choking on your slobber and that would be the noise I'm going for. :-) We've had our moments this week. I wish I'd gotten some pictures or videos, sadly I haven't. I don't know where my camera is and I haven't looked thoroughly for it. I bring it with me generally back and forth so it gets moved a lot and I haven't really looked everywhere for it. Now it's starting to drive me nuts. As Nathaniel, my cousin put it, "Don't ask me where I last had it! If I knew, I would have found it wouldn't I?". Thank you!

Peter is changing so much. He's grumpier then before and learning how to do all kinds of things. He can scooch around on the floor. He's able to get from point A to point B. He may not be that quick but he's effective. We can be outside gardening and I'll put him on the blanket and he can make it off the blanket to the grass very quickly! Sometimes I have to just let him keep eating grass because I have mud on my hands and can't fish it out of his mouth. He can sit up and stay sitting for a while until he finally just leans right over and flops on his belly. He likes to play the airplane game. He prefers to be standing at all times and he asks to be put down. Kind of. He thinks he can get around when you let him down which is really funny because you wonder if you put him down, what difference will it actually make when he can't move? :-) Well, I guess he can scooch places.

I have some pictures from my camera phone that show the growth in our garden. Pretty neat.

Car rides

how I hate them. It seems that we are beginning to like the car less and less. Joy. You would think since we have been traveling close to every day since ummmm he was born he would be used to the car. Not a chance. Some days we have beautiful peace. That translates to Peter sleeping peacefully in the back and me listening to the radio. More often then not lately I have a fussing crying baby in the back. I'm driving down the road with one arm stretched behind me, caressing Peter's face and offering him my finger to chew on. Some times it works and the payoff is a calm, nearly content baby and one arm nearly popped out of it's socket. What fun! Another option is having someone else drive and me leaning over the car seat to nurse him. Peter thinks this is the best way to drive EVER! I on the other hand have sustained countless bruises from the carseat and the jolting.  In otherwords. I despise the car. On that happy note, we'll probably be running errands today. :-)

This is Peter's latest big thing. He likes to get people all concerned about his health by coughing. I think it's pretty obvious it's not real but apparently he can be quite convincing! :-)

Also, this morning he woke me up bright and early at 6:30 with this >>>

Such a cheerful way to wake up! Although this video is taken from last night after our evening walk which I personally think is his favorite time of day.

Rant

I've been thinking of how my life has changed this past year. My perception of it and then other people's perception. I look at my life in one way and other people see it totally different (or maybe that's just my thoughts). I've heard this phrase dozens of times lately, it goes something like this, "Wow, getting married, a baby and a house all at one time! You've been busy!" etc.etc. etc. or "so much has changed for you getting married, a baby, a house, now you know what the real world is like." pulleeezzz. *time for the 13yo eye roll* ;-) Seriously though. I have had doses of the real world since I was six years old. It's one of my greatest frustrations to hear that comment. Because no matter how non-judmental that person may be, the person asking the question, stating the statement, whatever, there has always been a person before him and most likely after who has been judmental and will be. It's the way of the world. So I'm prickly and snappish and I have snarky replies, all in my head but instead I smile and answer non-chalantly. At least if you don't know wether someone is being judgemental you can at least give them the benefit of the doubt or try to. Emphasis on try.

To be frank the way I look at this whole wonderful year is this. What a fantastic triumph. I'm not the average 20 year old planning out who I'm going to meet up with tonight, what party is next or even studying hard for the next test. My life consists of me raising a baby, planning on meeting my husband tonight for some fun, studying hard to stay educated on real life issues that will and do effect the livelihood of my family. I have goals and no they may not seem lofty to some or very wise to others, they are mine. As I've matured I'm not afraid to admit my true goals. I no longer wish to fit into the box and make up these goals to please others, goals I know they would want to hear.

I always wanted to be a mom. That was my goal, my dream, and lucky for me its something that I get to keep doing. It's a goal that continually is fufilled. No that doesn't mean I'm going to stop making goals but being a mom and having a family were and are my top priority. I didn't want anything more and sometimes I wonder if God hasn't made it this way for a reason. I wish people would see me with my family and all that we have done this past year and think that Peter is a perfect creation. That he is our gift and is given to us on loan from God, that we are so blessed to have him. I wish everyone could see that he is the best of me. Someone to love unconditionally, to make any sacrifice for and moreover I want to.

I know a lot of people questioned our judgement on getting married young. We plowed ahead against the advice of some and with the encouragement of others. Despite not knowing that we would get jobs right away or that school would take off we plowed ahead. No things didn't happen exactly as we thought or hoped but they definitely didn't turn out bad. Yes, things changed but who's to say it wasn't for the better? I don't feel like going into the details of my personal life with everyone, I really don't. So yes actually when you ask me if I'm sure I have the date of conception right, if this was an accident, if I know what a tv is for, yes I find that offensive. If you want to know personal details about my s** life just ask! Oh wait, you just did! We got married, we made a baby, (yes there was a decision but once again personal) we bought a house and are living happily. Not to say our lives are without stress or are easy but I'm happy with our choices.

Oh and for the record I most likely will lie to you if asked if Peter sleeps through the night. It just too much hassle and heart ache. Occasionally if I'm feeling particularly spunky I'll answer the poor dear who coined the question. hehehe Of course he doesn't, he's breastfed, we are using NFP and HELLLOOOO have you ever been engorged? You probably don't want those details though. lol

a long and winding update

Well since the last time I posted on here Peter has gained weight and height. He just figured out how to reach for toys and grab them. He gets what he wants and it immediately winds up in his mouth. Yay! He can play on his bouncy toy lifting both his legs way up in the air to hit the toys and hear them make noise. He's a noisey, happy, excited baby especially at seven in the morning. I desperately try to sleep through the kicking and the squealing.

So the day before yesterday we had our first and hopefully last brush with EMS. I figure we've gone and got it out of the way now and I'll be happy to never see them at my home for any of my children ever again. Well, Peter once again has thrush mostly I'm guessing because I never finished treating it for the total 10 days required. Which is what I'm working on now, anywhoooo... I had him on the floor and was opening the bottle to put some on my pinky to swab out his mouth like I've been doing and he kicked my hand. The gentian violet splattered all over. His arms, my arms, his chest and then I noticed he had a spot on his cheek. Amusing at first to see all that purple but he opened his eye and looked at me and all I could see was purple/black. So much purple in his eye you couldn't see the iris or the pupil. He wasn't crying until I picked him up and Sarah and I started for the bathroom to rinse and rinse out his eye.

I don't think I've ever felt more sick to my stomach. He was hysterical and the only info. on the back of the bottle was seek medical attention immediately. I was getting my stuff together, purse, keys, phone, diapers and clothes. Peter wasn't wearing anything at all because I was getting him dressed at the time. About the time that we were getting in the car to go to the med clinic I realized that I really couldn't risk putting him in the car to drive 15 min or so plus the time it would take to get seen. I needed to spend that time rinsing out his eye. All in all only about two or three minutes had passed. Sarah and I held him down over the seek and kept flushing his eye while we waited for EMS to get here. The first to arrive were the firemen of course because they're just right down the street. Basically they didn't know any more then me, but thought we should keep rinsing it out. So we alternated between rinsing out his eye and holding him. They checked his vitals and blah blah blah blah. Oh while the firemen were here Sarah leaned against our stove igniting paper towels I had used to wipe my crying snotty face. Lovely. So while the stove has a huge flame on it and I'm standing there nursing a crying baby while standing on one leg I beat the stupid fire out with a pot holder while the three firemen in my kitchen just stand there and watch. Thhhannnks guys. Oh and they also made a comment along the lines of "well good thing we were here." They were really nice though and calm and kept me calm, pretty rational.

When EMS got there they called Dell Children's Hospital to ask the doctors there what they thought and since Peter's eye was only tinged purple at this time they decided it would be fine to just keep rinsing it out at home. Pooor baby, his eyes was all purple and his lids all bruised and swollen because we had been prying his eye open. My sisters, brothers, well my whole family has a twisted sense of humor...so I could understand how someone could come up with funny jokes about the boy with a purple eye and all the things people could call him. HOWEVER, I think that none of us would have made any of those jokes at that time. Maybe later but not then. Not the old fireman. He thought it was funny. Funny, Funny, Funny.

On a happier note, we moved into the new house last weekend and are loving it. So much more room! It's wonderful. It's light and airy, we were able to get all of our wedding gifts out and actually use them! Who knew we had such pretty things. Everything is getting decorated and falling into place. Peter is on a little routine and it's great. Some of my siblings are coming up here after my Mom has little Joseph and we're going to see about planting some stuff out in the back. I'm so excited to be getting a new little brother. Cuz the old ones are soooooo boring let me tell you! ;-)

baby wearing and baby feeding

Peter is still his usual not crying self. He's a fusser not a crier. Another thing why is it such a big deal in this country if your baby cries? The question, "Does he cry a lot?" ummm no "Oh well he's such a good baby then." ummmm actually I don't really think that makes him a good baby, just an easier going one. To be good or bad you would need to know that you are doing something wrong or right for that matter and do it. Whatever, just a little annoyance. Anyway he doesn't cry or wail for anything more then two minutes if he does start wailing. The boy definitely can, gave us a nice dose of that last night. Mostly because he wanted to be outside for a good hour and neither me or Travis would spend that time outside with him. Sounds like our problem. :-D

Peter has his own little routine. Wake up early, start fussing til I get my lazy butt out of bed, change his diaper and play with him. Then until about noon he spends the morning in a state of eating and cat naps. The entire morning is eat for thirty minutes, cat nap for thirty, then back to eating. Afternoons are for play times and cat naps. Evenings are long stretches of feeding and walking outside. Always outside. Must be walking. About nine o'clock he is ready for sleep. Why don't we give the kid what he wants? I really do try to go off his cues. Sadly I know what he wants by his noises. Nearly every time I can tell you what he wants, it's just whether I want to do it or not. Pathetic really. By the end of the day aka = 5pm I am done literally, I don't want to be walking or holding him or anything. I want to not be holding a warm sweaty baby and I definitely don't want to be walking around outside. I'm tired my legs hurt and please don't make me bounce on that stupid ball anymore. But I do. Generally. Except last night so instead I listened to him cry for five minutes or so while I cleaned the bathroom. Why for goodness sake can someone else not do that?

Thus I have come to the conclusion that community living/tribal living is awesome. Was anyone truly meant to take care of babies by themselves? I don't really think so. I think we were meant to have the support of our moms, aunts, sisters and cousins. I think that children were probably meant to grow up in a environment surrounded by many people caring for them and their mother's being there to keep an eye on things and be the ultimate and obvious first choice for food, comfort and love. Probably would reduce postpartum depression. Whatcha think? helping me pack!

Genetian violet

Yesterday I was on the phone with my mom and was talking about Peter and how he never seems to get rid of all the milk in his mouth and how disgusting it looked. Kind of like curdled milk all over his tongue. Never thinking he might actually have thrush. Turns out he does. On further inspection he had the white spots all over the inside of his mouth, on his cheeks, gums and inside of his lips. Super difficult to wipe off and bleeds slightly when you do. Ooops. I think he's probably had it well over a week now. :-o

So Travis picked up some genetian violet from the drugstore came home, I put it on and tried to feed Peter. The result was quite a mess since someone cannot eat without bobbing his head back and forth and to and fro. Just check it out for yourself!



Bathtime can be scary. Actually he likes baths unless he hears the water running. Then you get this face.

Lesson of the Day

Never apply hair remover cream without making sure Peter has a full tummy. You will end up with a rash and burning sensations or listen to your child scream and cry uncontrollably. I opted for the rash. Folks there is a reason why the bottle states DO NOT leave on more then 10 minutes. Oops.

On a happier note; Peter is now 23 inches long. Crazy that he grew 3 and a 1/4 inches in 5 weeks! We spent a very chill day running to the new house to let the GE guys in with our washer and dryer. Then came home chillaxed. Tried to pack. Wrote a couple thank you cards and went to Home Depot. We stocked up on some paint supplies and other things we will need out at the house and hopefully we'll take them over there tomorrow. Tomorrow Grandma comes. Tomorrow I will finally have a clean apartment again. YAY!

Now if I could only get Peter off my lap for five minutes so I could go take the towel off my head and brush my hair. Probably won't happen so when Travis gets here in an hour and a half I'll probably still have my hair in a towel. Lovely how fast you move with a baby. :-)

Peter getting his clothes changed. What a face!

<--- our new bedroom

<----- lovely workable kitchen. notice we have counters!
<--- living room, dining area
<---- living room, front entry

Our Anniversary

yesterday was our first anniversary as a married couple. we started the morning off by getting our wedding cake out and having that with coffee for breakfast. it surprisingly still had a lot of flavor and was pretty tasty. yesterday was a great day just spending it here with travis and peter. we went out in the afternoon to ikea and to dinner. ikea was great, peter slept through the entire store but once we got to dinner it was a different story. let's just say that travis and i didn't get to sit down together throughout our entire dinner. lovely.

it's been a great year. people have constantly told us how hard married life will be and that the first year is the hardest. so far, so good. for us it's been easier together then apart. there were definitely things this year that took getting used to and we had some adjusting to do. minor differences but no real fights. i'm so happy to have travis coming home every day and cooking dinner for us. he's such a good cook and i rarely cook anything for us anymore. i wanted to write some other things but peter is fussing.

bathtimes and naptimes

Peter was a grouch yesterday morning. He was sleepy and tired and wanted to be up and then wanted to nap. It probably would have just gone over much better if I had just laid down with him and slept. Nope I continuously laid down with him for thirty minutes and got up which resulted in him waking up five minutes later. Or I would sling him and then transfer the sling to the swing resulting in a little more of a nap but not much.

Eventually the grumpy screaming child wound up in the bathtub with me where he happily cooed and tried to laugh because his laugh really hasn't come in yet. He happily thrashed around for thirty minutes. I fed him til he stopped nursing and then called Travis to get him. Immediately after the transfer from my wet arms to the dry towel the screaming ensued. I mean blood curdling screaming. I was just too tired yesterday, he wasn't hungry and I reasoned that he would be doing the same thing with me I would just have to keep trying different things to get him to stop crying. So I continued to wash my hair, slightly faster though, panic was ensuing in my heart from not picking up the crying baby. When all of a sudden it stopped. I called out of the tub to ask Travis if he was still in the apartment and he's like "yes" then I hear "crap you just woke him up." ooooohhhh pullleeeeezzzzz, he's Peter, he's a sleeping baby it happens. I laugh and keep bathing.

After getting dressed for the day (it's 3pm btw) I walk out to the living room where Travis is rolling back and forth on the exercise ball with Peter on his chest sleeping. All very well and everything but Peter was still in a towel. I was starving so I seized the opportunity and went to the store. Sure the panic was written all over Travis' face. "what do i do if i he wakes up????" lol Making a long story short, they both survived unscathed, actually they were right where I left them and Peter slept the whole time. See what happens when you let him sleep touching someone??? A whopping one and half hour nap.

sleepy happy baby

yesterday we closed on the house. it's super exciting to be home owners, we got the keys and garage door openers and we can move in whenever we get around to it. first we want to replace tile in the bathroom, do a little painting, work on the floors and slowly pack up our stuff. how much stuff can there possibly be to pack up in a one bedroom apartment you might ask? according to travis, you have no idea. lol

peter spent most of the day in the car yesterday sleeping poor baby. every time he fell asleep i ended up having to unbuckle him and wake him up again. he'd get really grouchy and then fall back asleep only to be placed back in his car seat woken back up again and locked in. over-all he was really really good. he was buckled in and out six time yesterday. only once did he start crying and crying really hard. fortunately i have become talented at leaning over the seat to nurse. lovely. immediately he stops crying, letting go every few minutes to make a loud complaining noise, i guess to let me know that he's still mad about being locked up. well me too.

after picking travis up from work yesterday we decided to stop at the botanical gardens. i haven't been to the botanical gardens here in austin, but i have fond memories of the gardens back in SA. it was a really hot evening and we walked around for about an hour. beautiful roses and huge huge trees. we got some ideas and thoughts for what we would like to do. peter slept through most of it, he really likes to be in the sling or in the wrap


peter spends most of his days happily eating then sleeping through the rest of it. he periodically wakes up and doesn't want to eat and is very happy and content to just play. playtime consists of making faces and testing out the legs. stretching and making faces. apparently all that eating and sleeping pays off because the kid is getting quite the little belly.



we were only home for a short time yesterday afternoon. just enough time to get in a full meal and then have diaper blow out. the result was both of winding up in the tub. he's such a good little water baby. he kicks and thrashes and waves his arms around. he was happy in there for about thirty minutes. anyway i'm having a hard time sticking to one subject. he's so much fun to talk about!

waiting on sleep

It's 6:30 I've been awake, wide awake, browsing magazines, checking webpages and walking the floor since 5:30. This has become a usual habit for the two of us, Peter and me. He wakes up precisely ten minutes before the neighbors alarm and will not be sedated by nursing he wants up. So we get up and play for a few minutes. I pop him in the bouncer where he sleeps fitfully for about 15 minutes. I take him out and nurse him, pop him in the sling where he sleeps fitfully thrashing and moaning til he really passes out around 6:15. Currently I transferred him to the swing and am waiting to see if that will work. If he's still out in ten minutes I'll sneak off to my room and catch so zzz's. None of this particularly bothers me, I know I'll catch up on sleep eventually and who can really complain when they really only have to get out of bed once or twice tops with a newborn?

What bothers me? The little grunty groany noises that wake me up to feed and the kicking while feeding, that doesn't bother me. The little piglet. Neither does the new found ability to continuously pat someone on the back while snoozing yourself. What's truly frustrating is no breast - eye coordination skills which equal me stumbling out of bed hitting the wall and feeling like cursing looking for the stupid switch on the night like. Crawling back to bed over the baby to switch feedings to the other side and listening to a voice make snarky comments during the night. I do not appreciate grouches in the night. Even if the said grouch doesn't remember what they said the next morning. It puts me in a foul mood. In the middle of the night, who wants to be in a foul mood over something someone who is sleeping says? Yea know what, if you don't want your precious sheet pulled off you by accident then sleep somewhere else. :-) Thus is the train of thought when you are the one who is the human feeding machine. Not that I mind, just the snarky comments from other sleep deprived people. How sleep deprived does one get I might wonder when they don't have someone suckling three to four hours at night though? hmmm? Well Peter is still out so off to bed for thirty minutes. Then shower time and going to close on our house!

Milk Drunk

I never thought that feeding a baby would be so entertaining! Peter grunts and growls and groans the entire time he eats. He also sucks away determinedly through hiccups and while coughing because he inevitably chokes on milk. When he finally does drift off into milk happy sleep his little chin drops and a huge mouthful of milk dribbles down his chin onto his chest. Accompany that with big wide baby grins and it's bliss to sit around on the couch all day and feed him. Even if I do complain that he's been glued to me all day. It's really not so bad when you throw in the milky grins and coos.

We are clear to close on our house, all that is left to do now is set up a time and date to go in an sign the paperwork. I'm so excited. It's all happening really quickly and it's all so great. So Travis got a job in January, we had Peter in March and closing on a house soon, all before celebrating our one year anniversary which is right around the corner.

2 week check up

BTW we had the baby. Birth pictures and short story to follow later.

Oh the tears, the actual tears streaming down the face. Babies I've noticed don't have real tears immediately but now Peter's have come in and it's very very sad. We went in for our two week check up yesterday. A little late but better late then never. We were doing the newborn screening test so that involves poking the heel to get blood samples. His poor little foot wouldn't bleed. We wrapped it in a hot wet rag before stabbing it and nothing happened. She did it again and just a tinny little drop and even after squeezing it only bled enough to cover one of the little baby circles out of the five you have to fill. Each time she poked him they told me just hold him tight don't let him squirm and don't bounce him or rock him when he screams. HELLOOO talk about mom torture. Oh well after the third poke we got enough blood to cover four circles and half a fifth and just called it good.



Peter has had one of those weekends. He's met way more people in a single weekend then he's met ever and had a couple new experiences. Some good, some bad, some funny ones and some we hope to never go through again.

We met the puppies. Mudge is a sniffer and a cuddler and was happy to check out the new baby and plop down on the floor next to me. Rocky's more of a loud excited approach. BOUNCE BOUNCE sniff sniff and that's about all.

Peter stayed with the kiddos, grandpa and oma for an entire hour while mommy picked up Travis from the hair cutters, went to home depot, came back home, packed and got something to drink. Not a peep, perfect little guy.

Went to our first coffee shop, met Kolbe and had an accident over Daddy's arm, and the table much to my great amusement. It always makes me laugh when Peter pees on someone other then myself. I get peed on so often at this point in time it's barely noticeable. :-)

Met Uncle Christopher on R&R from Iraq. Spent an entire hour in church being held by no one other then him much to the dismay of everyone else in the family. The family is very into baby hogging and no on is very good at sharing. That's why my dad spent a chunk of time pouting because no one would share.

My sister Lauri Anne had her first Communion and we all had cake that was great.

Walked into the kitchen and discovered Uncle Jacob giving Peter chocolate. Babies don't need chocolate thank you!


Peter had his first hysterical crying fit. Poor Peter, we're still not sure if when we cry mom will get us right away. So he's been testing me. All day yesterday and the day before. Hopefully this will stop soon.


All in all it was a good weekend. We probably won't be going back to see family to visit until next month and then I'll probably be staying for a week so I can really visit with everyone. There's never enough time in the weekend to get everyone in that wants to see you. Plus by then he'll be a little older, a little bigger and I won't be as worried about germs. Yea, right.

It's really frustrating for me stepping up and being the grown up. I'm realizing though as I'm going through this journey of being a mom that I have to be in charge of the surroundings otherwise people walk all over you. Ultimately I do no what's best for him and why shouldn't I? I spend 24 hours a day with him and there's no reason I should cave in to the stranger who lectures me on not letting that lovely old couple hold him for just a little bit. Or the family who continuously says, "Oh he's really okay" no he's really not. The reason we experience so little crying over here at our house is because we really que into Peter's noises. He never gets to the crying stage. Some noises we no know mean he's hungry, mother's mean he wants in the bouncer or swing, other's mean he needs his diaper changed. When I hear something and I know that he needs food or he wants to be down and I tell such and such person that and there response is "no honey he's just fussy or no he's just fine, just watch." That's not okay. It's disrespectful, it's rude and I end up getting really upset and not saying anything until Peter gets really really upset. That's not okay either. I'm going to have to learn to just stand up for myself and him and get him before the tears start. Because I do know his signs and I shouldn't give in just because they're family or older or whatever. Just because I don't want to let him cry doesn't mean that we're coddling him and that he won't be independent. Every parent does things differently, doesn't mean it's wrong it's just different. We have the right to do things how we wish to do them and input should only be given when asked. Enough of a rant for now, off to bed again it's 6AM. lol

househunting and food

It's yet another Tuesday and I still don't have a baby. Kind of crazy considering the bed rest and the on again off again nights full of contractions.

Last night we had Travis' aunt and uncle over for dinner, the first time we've had dinner over at our apartment and we've been here since July? Time goes by quite fast. Yesterday I spent all day cooking sauerbrauten, red cabbage, and knudel. It was such a wonderful dinner, not trying to brag about the cooking, which was really good, it was more like just having people over and eating a good meal. I know that the last two to three weeks of pregnancy the baby gains the most weight and even though I've done relatively good all this pregnancy on weight gain I just don't really care anymore. I know that the more carbs I eat and soda I drink the baby will be really heavy but that hasn't curbed my roll addiction or my cravings for things like peanut butter. Oh baby. I wish he were here already.

We are still house hunting, finding some homes that we really like and I would like to go actually look at one or two homes we've found online. I think the only day this week we are going to go look at houses is next weekend...Hopefully I'll be able to go because I'm due next Sunday. Who knows, I might have a baby tomorrow. Travis and I have decided that even though we can live in a 3 bedroom home easily for now, we do plan on having more children and people over. SOooo it would be the practical thing to look at homes with either more then 3 bedrooms or a 3 bedroom with a second living room or den area that we could use as an office or game room with a pull out bed for guests. We'll see what happens.